End of the week

After the excitement of the photo shoot on Monday night, I went out with Mark from work on Tuesday night to see two of his friends from the time he was working on Trisha. We all compared notes about working on Jeremy Kyle verses working on Trisha.
Then the girls went to see the band they wanted to see and we went inside to watch the Liverpool Arsenal Match. I surprised Mark by talking to football fans about the match and cheering frantically when a goal was scored with 34 seconds to go before they went into extra time.
Then we walked down to The Green and had some more drinks... soon we were chatting away about all sorts and having a great time.
Then we went onto shots. I had 4 tequila shots and Mark had 4 shots of sambuca. For some reason, we got a bit lively and loud.
After that we wanted over to The Eddie, but the drink kicked in and we got very drunk very fast. We were too drunk to be in a pub so we left and headed to the bus stop.
I got the bus to Finsbury Park and then another bus up the road to Manor House.
I barged in the door and found Chris. From what he says, I turned into a limpet and hugged him for hours while telling him I loved him before passing out on the sofa with him in my arms.
I managed to wake up at 5am and make it to bed. Chris followed.
When I woke up at 8.30am I felt a bit rough but managed to pull myself together enough to get in the bath and get to work.
Mark arrived about ten minutes after me and we managed to make it through the day...

So now it's Friday and we've all made it through the week. It's been a gloriously sunny week and Chris has decided that the roof garden is his new project. Hopefully, with all the cuttings, trimming and seed planting that he's doing, we'll have the hanging gardens of Manor House before long.

I think it might be summer. Lovely.

My Attitude Magazine Naked Photo Shoot

I'd agreed to be a model for Attitude Magazine's naked issue. I thought it was a good idea at the time - but that was weeks ago. Suddenly, the day was upon us...

So I didn't eat anything after breakfast, just in case I didn't match up to the other guys I'd imagined were going to turn up to the 'Attitude Magazine's Naked Issue' photo shoot.

By lunchtime I wanted to eat my desk and computer in one go - and I was imagining that I'd be the fat, ugly one in a room full of toned, tanned stunners.

Carrie Bradshaw's neurotic nature had nothing on me by 2pm in the afternoon. By 4pm I was dangerous to know - but I looked FABULOUS.

But by 6pm I'd given in to my fate and I left the office to make the short journey down High Holborn to the photo studio where my fate would be sealed.

I pressed the buzzer and asked for Mark or Matthew Todd - and I announced that Matthew Christian was here. I mean - how is a boy meant to announce that he's here to get his cock out on camera?

To my surprise, the voice over the intercom sounded very pleased to hear that I'd arrived.

So up them there stairs I went. Unsure of what awaited me, but with hope in my heart and a happy place in my pants I walked through the door.

What awaited me? Men in pants. Young men in pants. Gulp! But wait, there was more... Alongside the young men in pants there was also a camera and a room full of all kinds of men - of all ages. Joy to the world - I was one of many.

After spending so long being so nervous, I soon relaxed and started to have a laugh with some of the other guys in the room. Although - I have to admit, the guys who were laughing the most were all over 30 and obviously didn't care too much about whether they had perfect abs or pecs. They were there to have a laugh - as was I. And that made them so much more attractive as a result.

I soon discovered how hard it is to make eye contact with naked men in their 20's while their being photographed - but then it was the 30-something's turn. That meant me.

Eduardo couldn't wait. Everything came off. But then we got told to keep our clothes on as we were going to be working our way down to the money shot.

Clothes went back on and the smiles came out. And do you know what? It was fun. We had a laugh.

Slowly, but surely, the clothes came off and all I remember is thinking was; 'What would Tyra say right now?'

To see quite how well, you'll have to pick up a copy of next month's issue of Attitude Magazine.

Because you're worth it. Enjoy.

new phone

I've got one of these new touch screen phones. Now I'll be able to blog loud and clear from all over the place. Restaurants, bars and from my bed.

My Birthday Party

Oh I had so much fun. I booked the upstairs bar at The Village Soho, where I used to hang out all the time in the mid-nineties and where I met Clive and my ex-boyfriend Steven.

There was so much champagne and Chris baked the most amazing chocolate birthday cake. Clive and Robbie turned up, Riannah, Simon and Rachel from work made it down and Richard Quest from CNN very kindly came along and bought 2 bottles of champagne to help things go well. My first ever boyfriend, Jonathan came along with his friend Dave and Tom, Dave and Susannah made the effort to come as well. My actor friend Alistair came for a quick drink and ended up getting very drunk and staying all night long and my friend Mad Joe came too and brought me a massive bunch of flowers which were lovely.

We drank a lot of champange and just had the best time.

Since then I've decided to get back to the gym and have been doing an hour of cardio every night since Saturday and am starting to feel like I'm getting my old body back again. Phew!

So much to tell...

God there's so much to tell.

I still haven't got any TV work and neither has anyone I know in telly. It's like last year all over again (without the dying cat and new relationship to concentrate on).

Chris and I have been considering getting a dog, but until I know what I'm doing workwise then it's just not fair on a puppy.

Oh my god - there was so much snow on Monday and London shut down. The buses didn't run and the tube lines got suspended. Chris got the day off and we went up to Hampstead Heath with Eric and had a lovely time. It's funny how much nicer everything seemed when we got some time off to spend together.



I'm thinking about trying to get a job at Foxtons as I always loved property and enjoy meeting people so it seems like a good combination. And you can make shed loads of cash too...

I went to Jonathan Simpson's 35th Birthday party last night and it was great fun. He booked a booth at Lucky Voice underneath Yo Sushi on Poland Street. It was me and 13 very hairy bears singing along to ABBA. It's strange to think that it's 18 years since we met to the day - the day I came out on the Manchester Gay Scene. He was my first boyfriend and it was so nice to be able to celebrate his birthday together. And it was even nicer that he let me take home the rest of his birthday cake so that Chris could share it as well.



Therefore I'm hungover. I'm trying to do some housework but seem to be sitting here drinking wine and chatting to Clive on Facebook while learning how to deal with Twitter. Is this my life? Endless internet sites and constant gossiping?

Why am I asking this question on blogger? It's hardly helpful.

Hanging out at The Ivy and The Groucho Club

So Jaci Stephens from The Daily Mail invited me to be a part of her quiz team at The Ivy Club on Wednesday night. I said that of course I'd do it, but then started to worry about how much I really know.

I went along and found the Ivy Club (it's just next door to The Ivy Restaurant) and I checked my bag and coat in. The place is LOVELY and felt very calming and classy. I had a vodka and tonic at the bar (nine pounds if you please) and waited for Jaci. There was a live pianist behind me and some very cute bar staff to look at.

Eventually Jaci turned up with her friends and we got ourselves a table. We all got chatting and then I saw Simon Sadler and his friend, the lovely and very handsome Piers Horne. I went over and chatted to them about Skiing and work etc before going back to join Jaci.

We did the quiz and it was great fun. In the first two round we were 2nd but by the end we came 3rd. Jaci wasn't happy, but as it was out of 11 teams I thought we did OK. Jaci proceeded to get us invited over to join the winning team and we all got chatting. The drinks were flowing and the chatting increased. I met a lovely lady called Amanda who looked like a cross between Caroline Quentin and someone else famous... it'll come to me later.

I got telling her about Dirty White Boy as we got chatting about Soho and ended up lending her the book. She promised to give it back to me when we came back to the Oscar Quiz on 29 Jan.

I met Duncan Ballantyne at the bar while I was getting a new bottle of wine and he was charm personified. I have to say I was terribly impressed with how nice and chatty he was.

Then Jaci and her new friends decided to go to The Groucho Club and so I tagged along. That's when things sort of got a bit too drunken for my liking. When I got there, Jaci asked if I'd taken anything as my throat had gone hoarse and I'd become very animated. I swore I hadn't but she didn't seem to believe me. I just had a sore throat because I had a cold coming on and I was animated because we were now on our 4th bottle of wine so I'd probably had nearly a bottle and half to myself. That's after the large vodka at the start of the evening.

So when it came time to leave (at 4am) we got our jackets and Jaci invited us back to her place on Great Portland Street. I briefly said hello to Maggot from Goldie Looking Chain, and said that I'd been one of the team of loggers that had worked on the Big Brother he was on and it had been lovely to log him as he was so nice... However, I was pulled out of the club by Jaci and the next thing I knew we were in a taxi back to Jaci's house...

Jaci's house is just lovely. It's a stunning loft space with a balcony from the living room and a huge bedroom. There is a glass roof and massive windows. We sat in the living room and drank champagne. As you can imagine, we were all quite drunk by that point and the conversation started to rotate around my sex life, which I wasn't comfortable with but chatted away regardless. I wish now we'd have found something else to discuss I have to say.

Anyway, it got to about 5.30am and Jaci had to go to bed, so our two new friends and myself decided to walk down to Balans for breakfast. We sat in Balans cafe and chatted over breakfast as the sun came up and the delivery people went about their business. It was just us and a young prostitute with her Polish pimp. She was quite sweet and he was quite fatherly, but not enough for us to be convinced he was really her father. His accent had a lot to do with that.

So my new friends left - one to go home and one to go to work - and I got the tube home. When I got in, Chris was in bed and so I crawled in next to him and spent the rest of the day feeling hungover, full of a cold and very tired.

Over, the next few days, my cold went global and I coughed and spluttered my way through a lot of tissue paper and self pity.

My first anniversary with Chris

Can you believe it's been a year since I met Chris?

He was working during the day - and I had a hangover after going to see Sandra at The Black Cap - so I slept until about 2pm and then got myself sorted out. I ironed Chris's shirt and trousers and a top for me, then I had a bath and a shave before going down to the shops to get Chris the watch that I wanted to get him for an anniversary present. I got the watch, a card and some wrapping before dropping the car off and getting the train down to King's Cross to meet Chris at his work.

We went for a drink at a lovely little gastro pub on York Way and his boss Liz was there too. She was lovely and wished us a happy anniversary. Then we walked up to Islington and went for some food at The Fish Works. We had oysters, calamari, fishcakes, mussels and more oysters as well as 2 bottles of wine and some champagne. I gave Chris is watch and he was very happy.

Then we walked down to the cinema and watched Slumdog Millionaire - which was a lot more gruesome than I'd expected and not quite the 'feel good movie' I'd been told about. I didn't like the bits where children were having their eyes burned out with oil, teenage prostitutes being raped in the back of cars, the lead character being tortured with car batteries strapped to his feet or the murder of his brother in a bath full of money near the end.

However, we got out of there and went to the Edward for a gin and tonic - just like on our first date.

Then we got the tube home and both agreed we were very happy.

When I am old...

I've finally found a poem that my mother used to love as I was growing up. Obviously, she didn't live long enough to wear purple with a red hat so maybe I'll take up the mantel one day. Or maybe I'll do it tomorrow.

WARNING by Jenny Joseph

When I am old I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.

I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other people's gardens . . .

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

Cutting down on the drink

Did I mention that I decided to stop drinking in 2009. I mention this because since 7pm this evening I have had a bottle of Chardonnay and have now had a glass of very good Shiraz. And yet I don't feel drunk... should I worry? I'll consider that over the rest of the glass of red while I watch Jo Brand being very funny on Live at The Apollo.

And into 2009

The end of The Millies came and went. It was a great night at Hampton Court Palace and I was looking after Richard Hammond from Top Gear so my TV career had come full circle from the days I did work experience on the show.

Then came Christmas - I drove Chris to Wales to spend Christmas with his family. Then we went to Manchester and spent Boxing Day and the next two days with Chris's friend Phil in his LOVELY city centre flat overlooking the Hilton Hotel tower (or whatever it's called).

After a night out in Via Fossa, Cruz 101 and Federation we got back to the flat (Phil went home with an Irish man and a South African) and I got caught up in the whole "we're in the city we love, in an amazing flat, with a great view and on a great night" and I asked Chris to marry me. He said yes (after telling me I was meant to secretly whisk him away to a tropical island and propose at sunset - which I pointed out would mean I'd be conning him into marrying me).

Now we're back in London and he's working at Rotunda. I'm back on the job hunt and have even applied for a public affairs assistant role at Stonewall (another case of coming full circle as I was the model for the Stop Descrimination in the Armed Forces campaign for Stonewall in 1996). I'm going to keep trying for more TV work but am also going to look for a real job now that I've got responsibilities. Like a grown up or something.

I'm currently reading 'Dirty White Boy' which is Clay Anderson's Myspace blog from the time he was running the shop on Old Compton Street and it's inspiring me to post more blogs more often from now on - so expect a lot of drivel whenever I get access to the web...

And so we're into 2009. I hope it's a good one...